Lesson #1746 - Derby Day

I'm begging you, please, someone who owns a horse, let me be the one to name it. That's the only part of horse racing that I want any part in. I won't even require the usual dose of drugs that people take before coming up with a name - that's how good I'll be at it. Here, let me try off the top of my head . . . how about "Whirling Derbish"? BAM. Give me the reigns. Not literally, because horses are huge and frighten me just a little.

What, you thought today would be about some punnerdery about the date being May 4th? Please. Wake me up when we finally create Hanuary.